I D

I asked the lad for a beer,
"You need ID if you wanna drink here,"
"You're under-age" he sneered.
"I think I've made myself clear."

I've been drinking in here for eight years,
I'm only having a couple of quiet beers,
This "publican law states...."bollocks is boring me to tears,
He refuses to serve me; the sum of all fears.

Come on, mate, I've had a growth spurt,
I am no longer a little squirt,
Don't think you're hard in your fake Armani shirt,
"Not servin' ya, its more than my job's worth!"

Well, I refuse to go,
but I have to drink J20,
which I drink slow,
my self-esteem is low.

Soon my ego is on the mend,
because its nice to see old friends,
even if the barman has driven me round the bend,
daydream about him being run over, its fun to pretend!

I decide to leave, it's been sound,
finally my taxi has been found,
I'm off, now, homeward bound,
so I leave the fucking Hare and Hounds!